A management team in which everyone always agrees seems like a pleasant team. Meetings are calm, the tone is friendly and decisions are made quickly. Yet a team like that often makes worse decisions.
Too little conflict is a problem too
Rebecca Newton coaches executive teams. In Harvard Business Review she writes that the biggest problem in many teams is too little conflict. Executives do not challenge one another. They stay neatly in their own lane, out of respect for each other and for fear of seeming unhelpful or slowing things down. Newton calls this “passive peace” (HBR).
She refers to research showing that an honest debate about ideas and decisions in a senior team can improve a company’s performance. This is debate about the content. Personal quarrels are a different matter. According to Newton, teams that leave difficult issues untouched often miss the best way forward and stay on the wrong course too long. At least half of her coaching projects with senior teams now focus on having difficult conversations.
Engaged people clash over ideas
Paul van Heeringen of IMPACT on the Job often hears the misconception that engagement only stays high when there are no conflicts. “That’s not true,” he says. “Engagement can even rise when a team knows how to handle conflict.”
Engaged people are enthusiastic and actively think along about how to reach the goals. They often agree on the goals and the ambition. Not always on how to get there. And not every idea is equally good. “So now and then you need to have a frank conversation with each other,” says Paul.
Why we cling to our own ideas
According to Paul, something familiar is at play here: an idea you came up with yourself quickly feels like a very good idea. With someone else’s idea, you have to try harder to see its strengths. Especially when it comes at the expense of your own idea, which you put time and thought into. You almost start to identify with it.
Research confirms this. Michael Norton, Daniel Mochon and Dan Ariely had people assemble IKEA boxes, fold origami and build with Lego. People valued what they had made themselves more highly than similar items they had not made. The researchers call this the IKEA effect. They point out themselves that it also explains why organisations favour their own ideas over ideas from elsewhere, even when their own ideas are worse (Harvard Business School).
“There’s nothing wrong with that,” says Paul. “But your brain does need to get past it. And sometimes that takes a sharper conversation.”
What happens when you are too nice
When a team is too nice, the people with the really good ideas do not feel valued. And those good ideas are left on the shelf. “If everyone in the room agrees with each other, you’re not being effective,” says Paul.
The decision then lands in the organisation, even though nobody has really debated it. Employees notice this in policy that keeps shifting. Also read Erratic policy gets in the way of work engagement.
Satisfied people have more to lose
The great thing about engagement, according to Paul, is that sparks can fly for a moment. There is emotion and commitment, and at the same time you understand each other. Engaged people are mentally more resilient and accept a better insight more quickly, because in the end they only stand to gain. “Satisfied employees have a lot to lose,” says Paul. “That’s where the difference lies.”
How to make disagreement normal
In HBR, Newton offers several pieces of advice that fit well with what Paul sees:
- Agree together on what you are there for. A shared purpose makes it easier to disagree, because you know where you want to go together.
- Meet about questions, not updates. Share updates in writing beforehand and use the meeting for the difficult questions.
- Ask questions that invite disagreement. For example: “What are we missing?” or “Why might this not be the right direction?”
- Build trust in each other’s intentions. If you know the other person wants you to succeed, you can take criticism more easily.
- Clear is kind. Raise tensions directly with the colleague concerned, not in the corridors.
Also read More effective teams through psychological safety.
How engaged is your team?
With the Employee Engagement Survey (MBO) from Leiders.nl, you can see for each team how much energy and dedication there is. That tells you whether you have a team that dares to debate because it is engaged, or a team that is mainly satisfied and keeps the peace. With the Responsible Leadership Scale (VLS), you measure how employees experience the leadership.
